A Special Focus on “Military/Veterans” and New Man Therapy Resources

By Sally Spencer-Thomas

The constant beat of the major media drum often paints a grim picture of Veterans and suicide. Sometimes we wonder
if these messages become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Consistent headline include data such as

• Approximately 22 Veterans die by suicide each day (about one every 65 minutes).
• In 2012, suicide deaths outpaced combat deaths, with 349 active-duty suicide; on average about one per day.
• The suicide rate among Veterans (30 per 100,00) is double the civilian rate.

Listening to this regular narrative a collective concern and urgency emerges on how best to support our Veterans
who are transitioning back to civilian jobs and communities. Many Veterans have a number of risk factors for
suicide contributing to the dire suicide statistics mentioned above including:

• A strong identity in a fearless, stoic, risk-taking and macho culture
• Exposure to trauma and possible traumatic brain injury
• Common practices of self-medication through substance abuse
• Strong stigmatizing view of mental illness

Thus, employers and others who would like to support Veterans are not
always clear on how to be a "military-friendly community." What is often
 not always expressed in these media reports about statistics and risks is
the incredible resilience and resourcefulness our Veterans have when
facing many daunting challenges and the many ways that they have
learned to cope.

The Carson J Spencer Foundation and our Man Therapy partners Cactus
 and Colorado's Office of Suicide Prevention set out to learn more about
these questions and conducted a six-month needs and strength assessment
 involving two in-person focus groups and two national focus groups with
representation from Army, Air Force, Navy and Marine Corps and family
perspectives.

When asked how we could best reach them, what issues they'd like to see
addressed, and what resources they need, here is what they told us:

"I think that when you reach out to the Vets, do it with humor and compassion...Give them something to talk 
about in the humor, they will come back when no on is looking for the compassion." They often mentioned they
 preferred a straightforward approach that wasn't overly statistical, clinical or wordy.

Make seeking help easy. A few mentioned they liked an anonymous opportunity to check out their mental health
 from the privacy of their own home. Additionally, a concern exists among Veterans who assume some other service
 member would need a resource more, so they hesitate to seek help, in part, because they don't want to take away a 
resource from "someone who may really need it." Having universal access through the Internet gets around this issue.

New content requests: "We need to honor the warrior in transition. The loss of identity is a big deal along with 
camaraderie and cohesion. Who I was, who I am now, who I am going to be..." The top request for content was
about how to manage the transition from military life to civilian life. The loss of identity and not knowing who
"has your back" is significant. Several were incredibly concerned about being judged for PTS (no "D"-- as the stress
 response they experience is a normal response to an abnormal situation). Requests for content also included:

1. Post-traumatic stress and growth
2. Traumatic brain injury
3. Military sexual trauma
4. Fatherhood and relationships, especially during deployment

Finally, they offered some suggestions on the best ways to reach Veterans are through trusted peers, family
 members and leaders with "vicarious credibility."

Because of these needs and suggestions, an innovative online tool called "Man Therapy" now offers male
Military/Veterans a new way to self-assess for mental health challenges and link to resources.

• http://mantherapy.org/
• http://mantherapy.org/#/richs_list
• Videos Highlighting Veteran's stories of hope and recovery:
• Tony: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAYLotW27Bo
• Also see stories by Logan, Kyle, Chad and Paul here: http://mantherapy.org/#/more_videos

In addition to mental health support, many other things can be done to support Veterans

• Hire a Veteran. Because they make excellent employees, and it's one of the best ways we can help support                                                                      their mental health and their transition back into civilian life:https://www.hireheroesusa.org/why-hire-a-veteran
• Financial Management and Planning: http://www.military.com/money
• Provide Service Dog Support: https://freedomsericedogs.org/

In conclusion, we owe it to our service members to provide them with resources and support and to listen carefully
to the challenges and barriers that prevent them from fully thriving. Learn how you can be a part of the solution instead
 of just focusing on the problem.

*****

REFERENCES

US Department of Veteran Affairs (2013, February 1). U.S. military veteran suicide rise, one dies every 65 minutes.
 Reuters, Retrieved from mobile.reuters.com. July 2,2015

Hargarten, J., Buurnson, F., Campo, B., and Cook, C. (2013, August 24) Veteran suicides: Twice as high as civilian
rates. Retrieved from backhome.news21.com/article/suicide/ July 2, 2015

New Video Provides Guidance to our Nation’s Police Departments to Make Suicide a Health and Safety Priority

 New Video Provides Guidance to our Nation’s

Police Departments to Make Suicide a Health and Safety Priority

Denver Police Officers Make a Call to Action

Deputy Chief Quinones

Denver, CO – The Carson J Spencer Foundation, in partnership with the Denver Police Department, the International Association of Chiefs of Police (IACP), National Action Alliance for Suicide Prevention, and the American Association of Suicidology, launched a new video today entitled Breaking the Silence: Suicide Prevention in Law Enforcement, making a clear call to action to Denver Police Officers and Police Chiefs around the world to make suicide prevention a health and safety priority. Access video here: http://youtu.be/u-mDvJIU9RI .

The video was produced by the Carson J Spencer Foundation, a Denver-based nonprofit leading innovation in suicide prevention, and was supported financially by the Kenosha Police Department. Additional support was provided by police psychologists from Lakewood-based Nicoletti-Flater Associates.

Det. Sprague

“Physical health and well-being are important in a police officer’s life, but psychological and emotional health are just as important,” said Denver Police Chief Robert White. “We want to create an environment which provides options for all types of wellness treatment and encourages our employees to use services available with no stigma.”

“The tough-guy culture in law enforcement certainly makes for psychological hearty police officers, but when people are overwhelmed by trauma, loss, or a break with mental illness, this tough exterior can prevent the officer from reaching out and getting some much needed support and treatment,” said Sally Spencer-Thomas, CEO and Co-Founder of the Carson J Spencer Foundation and producer of the video.

Denver Police Department
Chaplain Dr. Jackson Pope

The video features real police officers, many from Kenosha and Denver police departments, who describe their struggles in coping with challenges of law enforcement and their own experiences with suicide.

“Our jobs, as law enforcement officers, often place us in the middle of highly traumatic situations and this can cause a lot increased emotional stress and trauma for officers”, said IACP’s President, Chief Yousry “Yost” Zakhary (City of Woodway, Texas). “In addition to making sure our officers are physically safe, we also need to make sure they are psychological safety.”

“Law Enforcement officers are the first line of defense in protecting our towns, cities and communities.  We must be vigilant in helping them to protect their own health,” said Doryn Chervin, Dr.P.H., Executive Secretary of the National Action Alliance for Suicide Prevention and Vice President and Senior Scientist in the Education Development Center, Inc.’s Health and Human Development Division. “The Law Enforcement community and its leaders are taking proactive measures to mitigate the risk of suicide and openly address mental health as a core element of officer safety.  The video, Breaking the Silence, brings forth courageous stories of police officers openly discussing their own mental health challenges and why seeking mental health support fosters resiliency and overall wellness.” 

Lt. John Coppedge

"The American Association of Suicidology is proud to be affiliated with this campaign to raise awareness of suicide risk and decrease stigma associated with mental health treating-seeking among those serving in our police force,” said Michelle Cornette, Executive Director for AAS. “We acknowledge the significant potential for trauma exposure in this line of work and strongly encourage treatment-seeking among those experiencing mental health sequelae."

“As a law enforcement officer for 30 plus years, the last eight as a chief, I assure you the care for officers' mental and emotional health must be equivalent to that of their safety and physical health. Use this video to start the conversation. Silence only compounds the problem,” said Kenosha Police Chief John Morrissey, member of the National Action Alliance for Suicide Prevention’s Workplace Task Force.

Breaking the Silence: Suicide Prevention in Law Enforcement Video: http://youtu.be/u-mDvJIU9RI .

###

The American Association of Suicidology (AAS; www.suicidology.org)is a membership organization founded in 1968 for all those involved in suicide prevention and intervention or touched by suicide. AAS leads the advancement of scientific and programmatic efforts in suicide

prevention through research, education and training, the development of standards and resources, and survivor support services.

Contact: Michelle Cornette, Executive Director, 202-237-2280, cornette@suicidology.org

The Carson J Spencer Foundation (www.CarsonJSpencer.org) is a Colorado nonprofit, established in 2005. We envision a world where leaders and communities are committed to sustaining a passion for living. We elevate the conversation to make suicide prevention a health and safety priority. We sustain a passion for living by:

·      Delivering innovative and effective suicide prevention programs for working-aged people.

o   www.WorkingMinds.org

o   www.ManTherapy.org

·      Coaching young leaders to develop social enterprises for mental health promotion and suicide prevention.

·      Supporting people bereaved by suicide.

Contact: Sally Spencer-Thomas, PsyD, CEO & Co-Founder, 720-244-6535, sally@carsonjspencer.org

International Association of Chiefs of Police (IACP)

The IACP is the world’s largest association of law enforcement executives. Founded in 1893, the IACP has over 21,000 members in 100 countries around the world. The IACP’s mission is to advance professional police services; promote enhanced administrative, technical, and operational police practices; and foster cooperation and the exchange of information and experience among police leaders and police organizations of recognized professional and technical standing throughout the world. Additionally, the IACP champions the recruitment and training of qualified persons in the police profession and encourages all police personnel worldwide to achieve and maintain the highest standards of ethics, integrity, community interaction and professional conduct. For more information on the IACP, please visit http://www.theiacp.org

Contact: Yost Zackary, President yzakhary@woodwaymail.org and Vince Talucci talucci@theiacp.org 

The National Action Alliance for Suicide Prevention (www.ActionAllianceforSuicidePrevention.org) is the public-private partnership working to advance the National Strategy for Suicide Prevention and make suicide prevention a national priority. Education Development Center, Inc. (EDC) operates the Secretariat for the Action Alliance, which was launched in 2010 by former U.S. Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius and former U.S. Defense Secretary Robert Gates with the goal of saving 20,000 lives in five years.

Contact: Eileen Sexton, Director of Communications, 202-572-5383, esexton@edc.org.

10th Annual Shining Lights of Hope Gala for Suicide Prevention

10^th Annual Shining Lights of Hope Gala for Suicide Prevention

Diamond Anniversary Event Celebrates Local and National Leadership

Denver, Colorado. August 4, 2014.  Ten years ago the founders of the Carson J Spencer Foundation (CJSF) had a dream: to elevate the conversation and make suicide prevention a health and safety priority. They began with not much more than a passion to prevent what happened to their beloved friend and family member from happening to others. Today, with a national reach through programs like Man Therapy (using humor to “man up” mental health), Working Minds (suicide prevention in the workplace) and the FIRE Within (youth entrepreneurs preventing suicide), they are known as leaders in innovation in suicide prevention. On August 24^th, 2014 at 5:30pm at the Denver Museum of Nature and Science CJSF will celebrate the 10^th Annual Shining Lights of Hope Gala. At this “blacktie optional” event, they will honor the partnerships and leaders working with them on the mission to save lives. For more information visit: www.CarsonJSpencer.org.

Each year, CJSF celebrates those who have gone above and beyond in their effort to support the cause of suicide prevention and mental health promotion. This year, CJSF will bestow the following awards at their Gala:

·         Shining Light of Hope Award: John Fielder, Nature Photographer

·         Media All-Star: Facebook

·         Volunteer of the Year: Randi Wood, Director of the Colorado State Employee Assistance Program

·         Corporate Shooting Star: Cottrell Printing

·         Social Enterprises of the Year:

o   Mountain Vista High School

o   George Washington High School

The Honorary Chair for the Gala is Larissa Herda, CEO and Chairman of tw telecom; tw telecom is also the Presenting Sponsor. Cynthia James will Emcee and Debbie Stafford will be the auctioneer.

“We are thrilled to have such great support present with us to acknowledge this important milestone and congratulate our honorees,” said Board Co-President Christy Belz.

Working-Aged Men and Suicide Prevention: A Focus during Men’s Health Week

Sally Spencer-Thomas, Psy.D., Carson J Spencer Foundation & National Action Alliance for Suicide Prevention

Around the world, men of working age carry the burden of suicide. In the U.S., suicide is the second leading cause of death for men ages 25-54. Additionally, men take their own lives at four times the rate of women. Because just about all of these men are working, were recently working, or have family members who are working, the workplace is a prime system to make suicide a health and safety priority. This week “Men’s Health Week” is celebrated internationally – here are some ways business leaders can help tie in messaging about mental health to help create a resilient workforce.

Men's Health Week advocates that the best way to improve male health is to tackle the most important health issues relevant to men, and mental health plays a big role in men’s overall health. As workplace leaders, we should investigate how job stress and workplace environments contribute to or protect from mental health challenges.

According to a groundbreaking and provocative book by internationally renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Thomas Joiner called “Lonely at the Top,” men appear to enjoy many advantages in society that should give them protection from mental health challenges, but often do not. On average men of working age have greater incomes, more power, and experience a greater degree of social freedom than women or males at other times of the lifespan. However, many men pay a high price for the pursuit of all that success. Too often men take family and friends for granted in the chase for top rank and ambitious goals and find themselves alone when hard times hit.  As a result, many turn to maladaptive coping like prescription drug and alcohol abuse, affairs and other forms of self-destruction which in turn can fuel cycles of increasing depression and anxiety.

As one book reviewer states, “if there is one thing we know it’s that whatever society rewards is what you will see more of. Have you seen Forbes list of the 500 foremost people who provide love, friendship, support, and laughter in the world? Nope.”

In the never ending chase to bigger, better, more, business leaders often encourage this damaging pattern and many top performers end up burning out or worse. Instead, by encouraging wellness and relationships, leaders can help their talent keep up the levels of productivity so necessary in the long term.

Resources for men’s mental health are few and many are ineffective because many men don’t find them relevant. Recently a new innovative resource has emerged that give men an opportunity to understand their distress in new ways; self-assess for levels of depression, anxiety, substance abuse and anger; and create a blueprint for change. This tool – called “Man Therapy” (www.ManTherapy.org) uses humor to cut through social barriers and get men talking, thinking and supporting each other when stress becomes unmanageable.

What can workplaces do?

• Promote the Man Therapy program through newsletters, social media and more. Several compelling videos can help with this, and they can be found here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBiixvDWpNht0xwzBYdC4KQ
• Train employees on how best to identify people in emerging distress and link them to qualified help before the situation becomes overwhelming. For more information: www.WorkingMinds.org
• Host lunch-and-learn brown bag presentations on mental health topics as part of your overall wellness program.
• Audit policies to see if yours is a “mentally health workplace” – more here: http://workingminds.org/images/Workplace_checklist.pdf
• Provide tools to help employees screen themselves (e.g., “Workplace Response”) for mental health conditions: http://www.mentalhealthscreening.org/programs/workplace/
• Find ways to reward emotional intelligence, mental wellness, and community service to help create belongingness and meaningful purpose at work.
• Take time this week to focus on men’s mental health during “Men’s Health Week” – it might not only improve morale and productivity at work, it might just save some lives.

Putting Dignity First in Mental Health

Written and Reposted with permission by Guest Blogger: EDUARDO VEGA

Putting Dignity First

dignityandrecoverycenter.org

Many variables affect people in their ability to recover from mental illness and manage mental health conditions.  There is not one program, service, support or medication that will work for all, or that will work for many for an extended period of time. Intuitively we know this to be true, although many are still driven by the dream of a ‘silver bullet’, a perfect medication or treatment, or even an ideal array of services that could perfectly match all our communities needs.

We do not know if science will progress to the level of a ‘cure’ or prevention for mental illness— if it is even possible to so radically alter the biogenetic vulnerability factors that predispose some to mental illness as to significantly reduce its prevalence in the world.

We do not know if we can ever be free of the impacts of trauma, stigma, abuse, discrimination, poverty, and violence and all that they contribute to the manifestation of psychiatric symptoms in our communities, and the barriers they represent to recovery.

We do know a few things. We know that some things almost always make a difference to people living with mental health challenges. We know that hope is the greatest fuel for recovery, that without it the best services and supports in the world are futile. We know that people can accomplish almost anything with enough hope, and can achieve almost nothing without it.

But we have not talked enough about dignity in mental health. About its role in connection to recovery and resilience, about its centrality in the nexus of relationships that links every one of us to each other. About dignity as a human right that should be foremost in all our interactions with all people. Or about the many myriad of ways in which systems, public media and individual attitudes work to diminish the dignity of people affected by mental illnesses every day.

Some people grow up with a sense of purpose, with agency and confidence—perhaps because it was inculcated in them by great parents or their culture or faith. Some seem to gain dignity by association with status, position, class or wealth, which perhaps is false in some ways.

Some of us had to learn about dignity from others. Seeing it in their eyes or their actions when faced with insult and adversity.

I learned about dignity from friends struggling to put a few months of sobriety together, from hundreds of people who were homeless, from more than a few newly released convicts, and from the many I’ve known who continue to face down the pain, shame and stigma of mental illness to retain regain whole and meaningful lives.

I also learned about how people seek out dignity, and how they avoid its opposite at a profound and almost reflexive level. How the indignity that went along with things I was ‘giving’ to people ‘in need’ could more detrimental than I anything I could positively ‘provide.’ I learned from people who were in more desperate circumstances than I could ever imagine that honoring their personal dignity was much more important than ‘providing’ them a service.

You don’t have to spend time in a inpatient psychiatric ward to have a sense of how often one’s dignity can be undermined in services. But a few snapshots can help—

·                    You called for help because you were desperate and felt like dying and couldn’t be safe. When help came they pointed guns at you, put you in handcuffs, took you away in the back of the police car while all your neighbors watched.

·                   Perhaps you came in voluntarily, feeling completely anguished or out of control, then a few days later you find your status had been ‘switched’ to involuntary and that the papers you signed meant you had given up your rights to refuse medications you didn’t like.

·                   You’re in your room where there in no privacy from your roommate—multiple times of day staff, nurses, sometimes even students come in unannounced, begin asking you questions, often the same questions you’d already answered several times. 

·                    You go to “art group” in which the art activity consists of large nubby crayons and children’s coloring books even though its is an adult/geriatric ward and the average age is over fifty.

·                    You ask for a pen or pencil so you can write in your journal and are told you can only use them while someone watches you at the nurse’s station— and that they are too busy to do so.

·                    You find that your privileges for phone calls or cigarette breaks were removed because you failed to attend enough ‘groups’

·                    You ask where the policy for restoring privileges is and are informed that this is a ‘staff decision made at rounds’.

·                   You tell your prescriber about the debilitating side effects of the medications your taking. In response she rolls her eyes, saying ‘you’ll get used it’ or ‘nobody has all of those’.

Stigma? -yes. Discrimination? yes— but to most people these things that happen every day are just plain insults to a dignity they may be already struggling to maintain.

If we put Dignity First all these things things that drive people into despair, that magnify the fear shame and self-doubt that so often accompany mental illness, all these can be wiped away.

So people won’t seek death by suicide or painful isolation as more dignified than supports for their recovery.

When we put Dignity First we approach people as deserving and seeking more from us than ‘care’ or services. We recognize people are challenging us to respect them first and then to bolster their opportunities to respect themselves. By listening and engaging with the intention to understand what that would require, we challenge our assumptions and the power relationships inherent in health care that work against people’s dignity. And that, as a result, drive many people away. Putting Dignity First we understand that recovery needs to include recovering from the indignities that they’ve suffered as a result of their symptoms, their situations and the messages they’ve received from others and their society about what it means to have a mental health condition.

In putting Dignity First we know that honesty, hope and sincerity are our best resources for engaging people who so often have lost their dignity. We help by offering resources, skills and services that people want to use, rather than ‘providing’ them with the services we have and rejecting them if those do not fit.

Putting Dignity First is not just a crucial step towards systems in which recovery is realized, it is the mind-set, the approach we must take in relating to individuals with mental health conditions, and in reforming our world into one in which all people live in communities that truly support recovery and mental health for all.

The Paradox of Traumatic Grief

Take the light, and darken everything around me
Call the clouds and listen closely, I'm lost without you
Call your name every day when I feel so helpless
I'm fallin' down but I'll rise above this, rise above this

~“Rise Above This,” Seether

The lead singer for the rock band Seether wrote those lyrics in the aftermath of his brother’s suicide. The video for the song depicts what many people feel upon hearing the news that their loved one has died.  A mother, a father, a sister – all going about their normal daily lives -- are suddenly blown completely off their feet by an unseen force. 

The course of a complicated bereavement, like the process that often follows suicide, usually does not follow the straightforward path outlined by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross so many decades ago, but rather twists and turns and circles back on itself through mazes of denial, sadness, anger, shame, blame, and multiple physical reactions.  Several authors have described an “oscillating process” in complicated bereavement – a moving back and forth between loss-orientation and restoration orientation^[1], between growth and depreciation^[2]. In this oscillating process survivors of suicide loss can move closer to some people and further away from others. They may simultaneously experience increased symptoms of distress and feelings of adaptation as these states appear to be independent dimensions.

As survivors of suicide loss learn to adjust to the empty chair and redefine life without the physical presence of their loved ones, they can feel like they have lost a part of themselves.  Not everyone is debilitated by this loss, however, and the bereaved often fall into one of three clusters:

1. Quick recovery.  Those who recover quickly without assistance and can return to functioning as before.  Some of these people are not distressed because they had only superficial contact with the deceased, while others are often internalizing and suppressing pain, anger or guilt.  In the latter case, maladaptive strategies of coping may emerge such as substance abuse or other compulsive behaviors.
2. Modest support needed.  Most people who were functioning well before the suicide need only a modest level of support for anywhere from a month to a couple of years.  This level of support might include outpatient therapy or support groups.
3. Psychiatric disability. Some people may develop a mental disorder, such as post-traumatic stress disorder or depression, in reaction to the trauma and loss and may require extended or intensive treatment.

For the first couple of years after my brother Carson’s death, I moved in and out of these three states. Sometimes I would feel like I was functioning well, other days I would get through with a call to a friend or a visit to a support group, and some days I would be so consumed with the sadness of what had happened that I would benefit from periods of counseling.

In the aftermath of an unexpected death, especially suicide, traumatic grief is a common reaction.  When this occurs both trauma and grief reactions are experienced together, and elements of this combined level of psychological distress are often debilitating and complex. 

A number of circumstances about a suicide death may influence traumatic grief reactions^[3]:

• Suddenness or lack of anticipation.  The unexpected death offers no opportunity for goodbyes, unfinished business, resolution of conflict, or answers to questions.  Very often the bereaved are left with endless “whys” and “what ifs.”  When loved ones die from a prolonged illness, by contrast, we have time to prepare ourselves for their absence.
• Violence, mutilation, and destruction.  Deaths that involve suffering or extreme pain may cause horrifying traumatic imagery and intrusive thoughts – whether or not the bereaved actually witnessed the death or the body. If the death occurred in a familiar or personal space of the bereaved, that space will most likely continue to trigger traumatic reactions.
• Preventability or randomness of death. The randomness of such a loss can trigger a greater sense of vulnerability and anxiety. This is often the case when there were no apparent warning signs before the person died.
• Multiple deaths (bereavement overload) or multiple losses. In addition to the primary loss of the person, secondary losses may include loss of an income, loss of a home, or loss of all things familiar.  The resulting disorganization can strain the family and social system.
• Contact with first responders or the media. Sometimes the reactions of first responders – who need to rule out homicide in every suicide case – can increase confusion and distress among those bereaved. If the events surrounding the death were newsworthy, the bereaved may also be dealing with the intrusion of the media.

Trauma reactions and grief work are often at odds with each other. On one hand, the trauma experience leads to continual intrusion of the death event.  That is, survivors of suicide loss can’t stop thinking about the death scene (even when they are dreaming), and disturbing images may flash before the mind’s eye when they least expect it. The horror can be overwhelming and the natural impulse is to stay away from anything that reminds them of the trauma.  Sometimes survivors develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in the aftermath of a violent or unexpected death. 

When I first started reading about trauma as a graduate student in the 1990s, I was moved by Ronnie Janoff-Bulman’s book Shattered Assumptions.^[4] Her basic premise is that traumatic events shatter three world views that all people tend to hold:

·         Benevolence of the world – people are generally good

·         Meaningfulness of the world – good things happen to good people

·         Self-worth – I am good and can keep myself and those who love me safe and healthy.

All three of these assumptions are usually deeply challenged, if not shattered, after a suicide death. The traumatic responses of re-experiencing intrusive thoughts through flashbacks and ruminations are the mind’s way of rebuilding new world views about the self and the world. When Randy and I were in Hawaii just months after Carson’s death, we were hiking along the Napali Coast – one of the most beautiful places on Earth – and I could not stop ruminating about the horror of my brother’s suicide. I remember saying to Randy, “In the last hour, I have imagined Carson’s final moments at least 40 times and have only thought of our children once. What is wrong with me?”

On the other hand, the grief experience works in phases as survivors of suicide loss come to accept the reality of the loss, and the tendency is to move toward things that remind them of the deceased. The intense sadness can feel like it will never go away; and I like to reframe this grief reaction as honoring our loved one. Kahlil Gibran once said, “When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.” 

The alternating cycle of horror and loving memories, of avoiding and embracing things related to the loved one, makes traumatic grief complicated.  Not everyone is incapacitated, however, and many find unexpected twists in the journey can lead them to “rise above it” and integrate their experience into a deeper understanding of themselves, their purpose, and their world.

For more information on getting support in the aftermath of a suicide death, please visit: http://www.suicidology.org/suicide-survivors/suicide-loss-survivors

About the Author

Sally Spencer-Thomas, Psy.D., is CEO and co-founder of the Carson J Spencer Foundation, a Colorado-based nonprofit established after the suicide of her brother. The foundation is known for “sustaining a passion for life” by developing innovative and effective approaches to suicide prevention among working aged people, coaching youth social entrepreneurs to be the next generation of suicide prevention advocates, and supporting people bereaved by suicide. www.CarsonJSpencer.org

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[1] Stroebe, Margaret & Schut, Henk (1999). The dual process model of coping with bereavement: Rationale and description. Death Studies, 23(3), 197-224.

[2] Baker, Jennifer, Kelly, Caroline, Calhoun, Lawrence, Cann, Arnie & Tedeschi, Richard (2008). An examination of posttraumatic growth and posttraumatic depreciation: Two exploratory studies. Journal of Loss and Trauma, 13, 450-465.

[3] Ambrose, J. T (n.d.) Traumatic grief: What we need to know as trauma responders. Retrieved October 30, 2005 from http://wwwctsn-rcst.ca/Traumaticgrief.html

[4] Jannoff-Bulman, R. (1992). Shattered Assumptions: Towards a New Psychology of Trauma. New York: Free Press.

Five Things Employers Need to Know about Workplace Mental Health and Suicide

Here is the bad news…

1.       Depression is a top driver of health care costs to employers.[1] [2] Depression represents employers' highest per capita medical spending (per-capita annual cost of depression is significantly more than that of hypertension or back problems, and comparable to that of diabetes or heart disease. People with depression also have more sick days than people suffering from other conditions)[3].

2.       If we take a snapshot of any workplace at any given point in time, at least one in five people will have a diagnosable mental health condition.[4] The most common among these are mood disorders like depression or substance abuse disorders like alcohol abuse.

3.       The majority of people who die by suicide are working aged people. While other groups’ suicide rates are holding steady or decreasing, the rates for men and women in the middle years has increased significantly over the last decade.

Here is the good news…

4.       Everyone on a workplace plays a role in mental health promotion and suicide prevention. By engaging in simple preventative steps (e.g., stress management, depression screenings, etc.) anyone can help maintain their own mental health and by learning practical tactics (e.g., becoming suicide prevention gatekeepers, referring coworkers to employee assistance services, etc.) employees help promote the mental health and safety of others.[5] [6]

5.       A comprehensive and evidence-based approach to suicide prevention and mental health promotion exists,[7] is cost-effective[8] and gives employers a clear guide on what to do. By being “visible, vocal and visionary” leaders, employers can set the expectation that a culture of health and safety is a priority and that mental health promotion and suicide prevention are a critical part of that priority.

For more information: www.WorkingMinds.org

About the author:

Sally Spencer-Thomas, Psy.D., is CEO and co-founder of the Carson J Spencer Foundation, a Colorado-based nonprofit established in 2005 after the suicide of her brother. The foundation is known for “sustaining a passion for living” through innovation in suicide prevention. Working Minds, a program of the Carson J Spencer Foundation, focuses on helping workplaces build capacity to promote mental health and prevent suicide. www.CarsonJSpencer.org.

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